Women in Oman sick of being stalked on social media

“It started with ‘Good comment, marry me’ which many others following found quite humorous and apparently it ‘made their day.’

“I found it all quite amusing to begin with, but was then flooded with friend requests with messages even saying ‘I love you’. When I woke up the next day I saw I had 128 notifications from Facebook with 99+ new friend requests.” 

Samantha story’s is not unique as women complain they continue to be stalked on social media in Oman with scores of unwanted and inappropriate requests made.

Roxanne, name changed at her request, told Times of Oman that after moving to the Sultanate seven years ago, her Block list on Facebook went from 0 to more than 300.

“Posting on helpful group pages gets you added and messaged by guys saying a range of things like ‘hi’ to very explicit things. Even when you’ve blocked the person, the message you had to read still upsets you,” Roxanne said.

“I’ve been told to my face that because I’m a Western woman, it’s expected of me to be easy to get. They feel like it’s their right to harass you, which is obviously awful,” she said.

The stalked women are of all nationalities and many report feeling uneasy on social platforms. An Omani presenter says even on her professional social media accounts; men will harass her. “The strange men are always trying to start chatting with me by sending messages and photos,” she said.

“I never respond to them because if I do they will never stop sending me messages. Sometimes I feel nervous when I see their messages because it has inappropriate language and I’m a married woman. Some of them want to start a relationship with me. It is unacceptable. It is only because I am a woman,” she said.

Her Highness Sayyida Basma Al Said, Mental Health expert and founder of Whispers of Serenity Clinic, believes that there is an evolution to harassment, and it will continue to develop.

“Sadly this is how we live in today’s world. Before technology, it was really about stalking with numbers, people would throw their numbers and before that it was with letters and now this. So bullying comes in all ways and sadly this is the new form. As technology improves, things are expected to get much worse,” Her Highness said.

“There are things which have gone to lawyers and courts and it doesn’t need that, because stalkers have nothing else to do in life, they might be lonely and empty and this may be their only excitement,” she added.

According to an official at ITA, sexual and financial blackmailing made up 45 per cent of the total 355 cyber crimes reported.

“These figures don’t reflect the real percentage of female victims as women are more likely to be hesitant while approaching authorities due to fear of stigma,” the official said.

Information Technology Authority (ITA) told the Times of Oman that whenever people come across an issue of this sort, they can get help.

“If people come across issues like cyber stalking or blackmailing and harassment, and want to report these incidents, they can call our helpline number 2416 6828. We will look into the matter and offer some guidelines to the people who report. “Sometimes we offer to report accounts and communicate with Facebook about people who send messages and bad content to others.”

Chairperson at the Omani Women’s Association Iman Al-Ghafri believes that the unwanted attention individuals receive is directly connected to the way women, and men, present themselves to the public. “Not only women are harassed, but men as well. It is all about how you present yourself on social media. For example, if you see a picture of a man who looks well groomed, has a nice smile and his shirt is unbuttoned, then you would be more likely to click on that profile.

“On the other hand, if you see a picture of a man, who has a white Massar on, and a beard down to his chest, only a particular group of people might click on his profile and for different reasons than the first gentleman. 

“This doesn’t happen just in Oman, but internationally. The way you represent yourself in a picture is either an invitation or a rejection,” Ghafri said.

JoJo Bird, Facebook group admin of the What’s Happening Muscat group, said they ran a group poll in April of 2016 on naming and shaming members who harass members of the opposite sex.

Some 401 members took part in the poll, with 363 members voting to name and shame.

“We went with the majority, and naming and shaming stayed. I always tell the women of the group not to engage in any form of conversation so as not to encourage any form of dialogue with the men.”

Source : Times Of Oman